A lot of people ask me

Stupid f**kin questions

A lot of people think that

What I say on records

Or what I talk about on a record

That I actually do in real life

Or that I believe in it

Or if I say that I wanna kill somebody that

I'm actually gonna do it

Or that I believe in it

Well sh*t if you believe that

Then I'll kill you

You know why

Cuz I'm a

Criminal

Criminal

You God damn right

I'm a criminal

Yeah I'm a criminal

My words are like a dagger with a jagged edge

That'll stab you in the head

Whether you're a fag or lez

Or the homosex

The answers yes

Homophobic

Nah you're just heterophobic

Starin at my jeans

Thats my motherf**kin balls

You'd better let go of em

They belong in my scrotum

Youll never get hold of em

Hey it's me versace

Whoops somebody shot me

And I was just checkin the mail

Get it checkin the male

How many records you expectin to sell

After your second lp sends you directly to jail

I like gay men

Please lord this boy needs jesus

Heal this child help us destroy these demons

Oh and please send me a brand new car

And a prostitute while my wifes sick in the hospital

Preacher preacher fifth grade teacher

You can't reach me my mom can't neither

You can't teach me a goddamn thing cause

I watch tv and comcast cable

And you ain't able to stop these thoughts

You can't stop me from toppin these charts

And you can't stop me from droppin each march

With a brand new cd for these f**kin retards

Duhhh and to think it's just little ol me

Mr don't give a f**k still won't leave

I'm a criminal

Cuz every time I write a rhyme

These people think it's a crime

To tell em what's on my mind

I guess I'm a criminal

But I don't gotta say a word

I just flip em the bird

And keep goin I don't take sh*t from no one

Cuz every time I write a rhyme

These people think it's a crime

To tell em what's on my mind

I guess I'm a criminal

But I don't gotta say a word

I just flip em the bird

And keep goin I don't take sh*t from no one

Liquor cigarettes and speed

Ligaments indeed

It was a seed who would grow up just as crazy as she

Don't dare make fun of that baby cause that baby was me

But how the f**k you sposed to grow up when you werent raised

So as I got older and I got a lot taller

My dick shrunk smaller but my balls got larger

I drink malt liquor to f**k you up quicker

Than you'd wanna f**k me up for sayin the word

My morals went thhbbpp when the president got oral

Sex in his oval office on top of his desk

Off of his own employee

Now don't ignore me you won't avoid me

And my nose is pointy

I'm the bad guy who makes fun of people that die

In plane crashes and laughs

As long as it ain't happened to him

Slim shady I'm as crazy as em

Replacin the doctor cause dre couldn't make it today

Hes a little under the weather so I'm takin his place

Don't make me kill him too

And spray his brains all over the place

I told you dre

You shouldve kept that thang put away

I guess thatll teach you not to let me play with it eh

I'm a criminal

Get the motherf**kin money and get the f**k up outta there

Ill be right here waitin on you

Yo em

Don't kill nobody this time

And I won't kill you

Hurry the f**k up thank you

Windows tinted on my ride when I drive in it

So when I rob a bank run out and just pe in it

So Ill be disguised in it

And if anybody identifies the guy in it

I'll hide for five minutes

Come back shoot the eyewitness

Fire at the private eye hired to pry in my business

Die b**ches bastards brats pets

This puppys lucky I didn't blast his a** yet

If I ever gave a f**k Id shave my nuts

Tuck my dick inbetween my legs and cluck

You motherf**kin chickens ain't brave enough

To say the stuff I say so this tape is shut

Sh*t half the sh*t I say I just make it up

To make you mad so kiss my white naked a**

And if its not a rapper that I make it as

I ma be a f**kin rapist in a jason mask

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